Sunday, February 19, 2017

Herding Cats

I'm making up for lost time I guess.  Two posts in one day.  What can I say?  
It's been one week since Kevin was in the Emergency Room.  Since then we have been keeping a close eye on him.  These past couple of days have been unusually rough as Kevin hasn't eaten a thing.  The pain is to intense.  He has all of his pain meds, I think the change in weather plays a part in the pain intensity.  The last time he ate something was Friday night.  The day before I ran to the grocery store and specifically asked Kevin if there was anything that sounded good to him.  He asked for bagels, cream cheese, and Gatorade.  So, I got him everything he asked for.  His appetite has been up and down for the past two weeks so he gets whatever he wants.  I picked up a bunch of fresh fruit including red plums that Kevin loves.  He didn't touch them.  He did eat a couple bagels so I was happy with that.  By Friday night he was up for actually eating an entire meal so I let him pick whatever he wanted.  He wanted a hot dog from Sonic so that is exactly what he got. 
While I was texting with Danielle on Friday about her illness, her allergic reaction, and her recent visit to Urgent Care for a shot, steroids, and new antibiotics and cough medicine, Kevin asked me to ask Danielle if she had thought about getting a blessing.  She said she had thought about it but she needed to talk to Chance (her husband) about it.  Later that night Danielle text me telling me she did want a blessing, but we needed to do it after Chance came home from work on Saturday.  I talked to Kevin about it Friday evening and he said he would be there.  By Saturday morning things had changed.  Kevin was having stomach trouble and wasn't going to be able to leave the house.  Kyle was off to work early so he couldn't go give his sister a blessing either.  I felt awful about that because I know we kind of pointed Danielle in the direction of a blessing in the first place.  Needless to say, Kevin has not eaten anything all weekend.  I did buy a lot of Gatorade so he has been drinking a lot of that just to keep his electrolytes up.  I still think the weather plays a big part in his pain and when the weather changes like this it always causes Kevin to sit things out for a bit.  
Today during Sunday School Danielle text me again to tell me her husband now has what she has.  She said her husband was freaking out because he didn't want to miss work next week but he refused to go to Urgent Care to get the medication he will need to fight this.  I told Danielle this is the kind of thing I always heard the temple sealer's words whispered in my ear reminding me that I agreed to be a helpmate to my husband.  I then told Danielle, just like her mother, she now gets to be a helpmate to her husband to help him understand that sometimes even big strong, tough, men need a little help too.  I also told her sometimes taking care of a husband is a lot like trying to herd a wild cat.  They scratch, bite, and hiss at you every step of the way until they realize what you are trying to do really will help them, then they calm down and purr like a little kitten.  (I hope she got a laugh out of that comment) Men can be so stubborn and usually never like to admit they actually need a little help.  I had to hold back my laughter with my silly little answer about herding cats since I was sitting in the middle of Sunday School.  LOL!  I think the part that bothers Danielle most is that Chance refuses to go to Urgent Care.  I told her, he will have to learn the hard way even if it means missing work a couple of days.  Next time he will be more pro-active and get in to Urgent Care early to avoid getting as sick as she got and possibly missing work.  Time will tell.  Frankly, I think they both need blessings because whatever this is, it's ugly!  
Tonight Kevin is still not feeling well.  He still hasn't eaten anything.  He is drinking but no food.  That two days now.  Tomorrow if he still isn't eating we may end up calling his doctor to see if there is anything Kevin can take to help.  That is, if Kevin will actually take it.  He can be a little stubborn in his old age as well.  Although it isn't like trying to herd a wild cat for me anymore.  It's more like a puppy.  You try and try to tell them something and they just look at you like they hear every word you are saying but still go and do whatever they want.  At least that's what it's like when Kevin is acting loopy and slurring his speech.  
I joke about my husband and son-in-law not to put them down, but to help us all get through some tough times.  Laughter sometimes is the best remedy.  I was merely trying to put a smile on my daughter's face during a tough time for her and I need that sometimes to myself.  I love my son-in-law and appreciate all he does to help my daughter when she is sick.  My daughter just wants to do the same thing for him.  For my husband, I love him too and I have to laugh sometimes just to avoid crying or causing him to cry.  After all, we are trying to move away from Kevin feeling like he is useless and unable to do anything and move on to finding new ways to do the things he wants and needs to do.  We struggle with this every single day and I have to remind him that he isn't dead yet and maybe his role is to educate people and help others realize that just because he is in a wheelchair he is still able to do many things.  I tell him often that it is up to him to not put limits on his abilities because others will always try to, and only he can set the bar on the things he can do because there are no limits.  I told him it's time to start listening to the voice inside of him telling him he can, not the one telling him he can't.  
Tomorrow is a holiday for us.  I think Lexi and I will be busy running a few errands and Kyle has to work.  We don't have many plans and what we do most of the day will depend on how Kevin is feeling.  More to come on that.
I should get going.  Take care my friends and we will talk again soon.
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