Thursday, January 19, 2017

It's Only Just Begun!

1.  ASAP typically stands for "as soon as possible".  What else could it stand for in your life right now?

I'm guilty of saying ASAP often, for me, it means, get a move on, don't drag your feet, just get it done!  Especially at work when I need to stress the urgency to find a resolution to a problem.  BUT, how here are a few other things ASAP could mean.  

1) Always Say a Prayer

2) Always Stop and Pray

3) After Some Action Pause

4) All Souls Are Precious

5) Always Singing, Always Praying

6) A Sour Apple Pie  (this one is just funny)

7) A Solution A Promise

Wow!  Some of these are awesome and if we remembered most of these alternative meanings what a better place this world we live in would be.  I will admit, I've had cause to spend a little extra time praying these past few weeks.  I find the older I get, the more I pray.  I think I realize more than ever that it is my most powerful resource available to me.

2.  Are you the last person to speak up in a group or the first to have an idea?  Why do you suppose that is?  Is it a good thing or not?

This all depends on the crowd I am with at the time.  If it's a familiar crowd that I know well, then I will speak up much quicker and it also depends on the subject matter.  There are some subjects that I will avoid all together and it's usually because I don't know enough about the subject matter to discuss it intelligently, so I keep my mouth closed.  OR, if the submit matter is controversial then I definitely steer clear of those kinds of conversations, except maybe in groups I feel comfortable in.  I think it's probably a good thing to steer clear pretty much most of the time.

3.  What do you remember best about being 12?

12 meant being the big kids in Elementary School I attended....or 6th grade.  It also meant being the big kids in Primary at church as well.  It meant attending Merry Miss (Or Activity Days they call them now) and having one day a week that we did fun things and made crafts.  I loved it!  I remember earning my Merry Miss bracelet and all of the charms that went with it.  It also meant memorizing all of the Articles of Faith and putting a medallion on my Merry Miss Banner.  It was a lot of fun!  Being 12 also meant that I was one year closer to 13!  I could hardly wait to be a teenager, although I'm not sure why, but I was so excited about it.  I think I was 12 when I started to wear a little lip gloss and pay more attention to how I looked.  I started wearing a bra at the age of twelve.  I thought that was pretty cool.  There were a few other things that happened at the age of 12 that meant I was getting older too, but we won't go into all those details.  ~chuckle~chuckle~

4.  January 18th is National Winnie the Pooh Day.  Which character do you relate to the most, and why?  If you're stumped go here for inspiration.  

I found this fun little test online that helped me determine which Pooh character I was most like.  I got Tigger!   This is what they said about someone who was like Tigger....

  "You are often described as "bouncing off the walls".  You are constantly bright, upbeat, and full of energy and you don't hesitate to spread your sunny attitude around."

While I do think there is a bit of tiger in me, I would never have guessed Tigger!  As far as I'm concerned, I don't thin the test really gave a fair assessment as to everyday situations.  Yes, I would not hesitate to help and try to spread a sunny attitude around, but I wouldn't say I'm FULL of energy.  Most days I come home from work pretty worn out.  ~chuckle~chuckle~ I would have guested Eeyore for sure!  I guess I can go with Tigger though.  I adore Eeyore though, I just don't have much in common with him.  What an interesting question!  

5.  What's an app you use that helps simplify or make life easier for you in some way?  

I use a banking app daily to check on things.  I love that I can now keep the checking account up to date with my app.  It's quick and easy to use, and I love it.  There are several others I use as well.  I'm constantly using my fitbit fitness app.  It allows me to not only keep track of my steps, it lets me keep track of other types of exercise, water intake, food intake, my weight and my BMI, and my blood pressure.  It's great!  I love my Iphone calendar that lets me keep track of important dates.  I don't totally use the calendar app for everything, but for certain things I have it set to remind me a couple days in advance.  I still like a paper calendar here at home to keep everyone on track.  I love, love, love some of the photo editing apps and have started doing a lot of my editing on my notebook or Iphone instead of on my clunky computer.  Much quicker and easier!  I like PicCollage, BeFunky, and Over is great for adding texts to photos.  I also liked having a blog app on my phone, until google did away with it.  I use to be able to put together my posts in a matter of minutes from my phone while I was on my lunch break at work.  I loved that option!  Now, I can still collect my ideas, but I have to wait until I get home to put it all together.  The last app I will mention is Maps!  I couldn't live without that app when I need to find a place.  I especially love the driving directions it gives.  That really helps when I need help finding someone's house in a neighborhood I am not familiar with.  There is one app I might like to try out eventually.  It allows you to track a phone.  I think that would be handy when and if Lexi starts dating more, especially if she wants to date someone we do not know.  I can't help it.  I want to keep her safe.  I'm sure she would HATE me using that app and I wouldn't do it unless she gave me the okay.  It's just nice there are options like that app available now.

6.  San Francisco (CA), San Diego (CA), San Juan (PR), San Antonio (TX), Sanibel (FL), have an all expenses paid long weekend to one of these destinations.  Which one do you choose and why?

That's a tough one.  I'd love to go back to San Francisco.  I've never been to any of the other places either.  I'd say, any would be amazing!  Any of these places would be FUN to see.  I'm open to all options.  ~smile~smile~

7.  Share with us a song that makes you feel nostalgic?  For what?

Wow!  I would have to say, pretty much anything from the 80's makes me feel nostalgic.  Especially groups like Duran Duran or Depeche Mode.  One song that comes to mind is Pretty in Pink by The Psychedelic Furs.  Why do these groups and songs make me feel nostalgic?  Because they take me back to my teen years.  Life was a lot simpler then and I didn't have to worry about things like bills, money, and my husband's health.  

8.  Insert your own random thought here. 

I've only been back to work for two days now and my nose is running again.  Arg!  I better not be getting sick again.  Time to take a some vitamins.  Arg!  Yesterday was a rough day.  I didn't get much sleep the night before and I was super tired by the time I walked in the door.  When I stepped inside the house I was greeted by two dogs who had found the garbage from the bathroom and had shredded at least one roll of toilet paper throughout my living room.  It's hard enough to walk in the door on a good day with them barking, jumping, and sniffing just about anything and everything as soon as they see you.  I'm not a fan of that kind of greeting.  I would prefer to walk in the door and settle in before all that fun begins.  We may have to work on some kind of way to work that out.  When I saw the mess in my living room I was frustrated and I said a few things that would have been better left unsaid.  Poor Lexi got the worst of it and the dogs don't even belong to her.  I feel awful!  Well, I apologized at least three times to Lexi and I think we got things straightened out.  I need to watch how I come into the house and the things I say.  That is something I can do.  I can control how I react which in turn will change the reactions I received from everyone.  I didn't mean to do that and it created a lot of ugly contention for the rest of the evening.  I'm not proud of that at all.  I will say, I'm not perfect and I make mistakes.  I'm learning every day too.  These are some of the things I reminded Lexi of as I apologized for the things I said and asked that she forgive me.  We talked a little bit about parents not being perfect and that we make mistakes sometimes.  This was while she was pretty upset.  We did finally talk about allowing me to try to do better and correct things.  

Now, I know what some of you are saying...."Why do YOU need to apologize?"  "You are the parent and there needs to be rules and expectations set."  You are right and we are working on that as well.  BUT, more importantly, I am not perfect.  I make mistakes.  I do and say things sometimes that I shouldn't do or say.  Do I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders sometimes?  Of course I do.  Could I get a little more help from my children?  Of course I could.  Bottom line here.  We are all going through this, for lack of a better explanation, "Funk" right now.  Things have got better since Kevin came home paralyzed from the waist down a little over a year ago.  What stage we are in of this "Funk", I don't really know.  How long will it take for things to go back to normal?  I'll be honest, it may NEVER go back to our so called normal.  Our husband and father......and our family, are forever changed by the events that caused this tragedy in our lives.  It's a process and it's going to take some time to get through all of this.  

In the mean time, I need to concern myself with the things I can do and I can change.  That begins with my approach to situations and my attitude.  I don't want my children to feel that they need to have my home completely in order and nothing out of place when I walk through the door.  I've never been that kind of parent.  I do expect my children to help out and if they see something that needs attention, take action.  They don't have to wait for my okay or even Kevin's okay.  Like the High School Musical song says, "We're all in this together" and we can work on this together.  Enough said about my bad behavior.

I did come in today to find my living room and family room picked up.  The living room vacuumed, and the guest bathroom picked up and clean.  Kevin and the kids spent some time taking care of a few things today.  Kevin spent a lot of time literally crawling on the floor to pick things up.  That's always hard to watch.  My grandfather lost both of his legs around the same age that Kevin was when he became paralyzed.  That didn't slow my grandfather down at all.  He had no problem getting down on the floor and playing with us kids and pitching in to help around the house.  He even drove a car.  I remember my grandparents taking me all over California when I got to visit them on a week long trip all by myself.  He drove with hand controls.  It was pretty amazing.  My grandfather didn't have all the pain Kevin has though.  I think the pain is the biggest problem Kevin faces now.  It controls everything he does and keeps him from so much.  I think Kevin would be moving on and trying new things if he didn't have so much pain all the time.  His pain scares me.  I'm not going to lie.  I don't like to see him suffering and I don't like him having to take the medications to ease the pain either.  I think our family would be healing a lot quicker if our children saw their father out and about and doing things in new ways now.  Sure, Kevin is a embarrassed at times, but our kids do not care.  They love their father and just want him to be happy and healthy.  AND they want to spend time with him.  It's hard on all of us.  

This whole thing is hard, and I'm going to leave it at that.

This morning I got up around five and got ready for work.  I was out the door and at work by about 6:45.  I got home from work around 4:15 and then the errands began.  Kevin had a doctor's appointment yesterday and he needed his prescriptions refilled today, so I ran off to the pharmacy to drop off the prescriptions.  Then, I ran to pick up some water and corn tortillas to make enchiladas tonight for dinner.  When I got home from the pharmacy and grocery store I realized we still needed dog food.  So, I got Lexi set up to run the corn tortillas through hot oil while I was gone so they would be ready to roll up when I got back from picking up Kevin's prescriptions and dog food.  I am so glad Kevin's doctor split up the big prescription for us.  It's a lot easier on the budget to pay $300 at once for a portion of the medication, then it is to come up with close to $1000 for the one all at once.  Insurance deductibles are a killer!  Tomorrow Kevin has another doctor's appointment with the doctor who treated Kevin after his injury.  No, he isn't the doctor that caused the injury.  Just the man that had to help Kevin through all the rough stages and still is.  Tomorrow we plan to discuss avoiding Severe Septic UTI's and E Coli, and other options for pain control I hope.  AND getting Kevin back into physical therapy.  

Speaking of therapy.  Recently our oldest daughter decided to shift careers.  She has decided to go back to school to become an Occupational Therapist.  She does a lot of the things a therapist does on a daily basis with her job and she loves it.  So, more power to you, Miss Danielle.  You go!  I'm excited for her. 

Once I was finally home from all of the errands, I put the enchiladas together and got them all in the oven.  While they were cooking I paid a couple bills online and started a load of laundry.  Kyle got the dogs fed while we waited for dinner to get done.  We all ate dinner and then I was worn out.  I finally crashed on the couch in our family room around eight, thanks to my little travel diffuser and my good night essential oil.  I was out quick, only to wake up again after ten.  Now, it's 1AM and I'm still not asleep.  Arg!  This is going to be a tough week while I try to get my body clock back to my normal routine again.  

Well, sorry for my rambling.  I should get going.  Take care my friends and we will talk again soon. 

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