I picked up paperwork from the doctor's office Friday afternoon. As I was reading the form I came across a word I saw before on a form Kevin needed completed prior to surgery. The word: Incapacitated. That word sets me back every time I see it. Not only has the pain doctor but now the surgeon have deemed Kevin incapacitated. I don't know how to take that word. I'm frustrated.
I think if the insurance company would have approved Kevin's admit to a Rehab Center he might not be in the situation he is in right now. He might be able to get around a little better now. Then someone would not need to be with him around the clock. Which really means I wouldn't need to be with him around the clock AND I could get back to work myself. I can't leave Kevin right now. He can't bend, lift, or twist. The man needs help doing the simple things. Like getting dressed. Tying shoes or even lifting up the toilet seat are just plain impossible right now. Not to mention how unsteady he is on his feet. The other day he nearly fell. He walks with his walker and someone along side of him to every where he goes. Well, the other day he tried to do it by himself with just his walker. (What was he thinking??) He got about 10 feet away from his bed and then he was calling for help. Luckily Kyle just happened to be home and could grab on to both sides of him and kind of pick him up to get him back to bed. His left leg is numb now, which could just be part of the healing process or could mean something else. We see the doctor at the end of this week and we will certainly ask at that time. Anyway, he is stressing me out a little...to say the least. He really wants to be more independent. It bothers him most nights and I find him crying when he tries to do simple things like use his little grabbing tool the hospital gave him to pick up something off the floor, but he still can't reach. Pulling a shirt over his shoulders is hard for him too. This has really taken its tole on Kevin. This whole thing has also take a tole on the rest of us. No one should see their husband or father in this state.
But believe me we know we are blessed. Things could be a lot worse.
We are trying to remember that this is just a test.
On another note, I got a new cell phone this weekend. We'll new to me. I have an iPhone now. Kevin has one and I use his a lot so I know how to use it. Someone was upgrading and gave me their old phone. Before I never really cared much about the type of phone I had just as long as it did everything I needed it to do. That is until I saw the difference in photos taken with one phone verses an iPhone. There is a huge difference. It will be fun to take pictures now.
I don't know if I mentioned this a couple of weeks ago or not. Anyway, about two weeks ago I heard a helicopter over our neighborhood. It was about 11:30 p.m. on a Saturday night. When I looked out front there were 3 police cars in front of my house. When my son tried to come home he said there were 5 total cars. We think they were at our next door neighbors house but I'm not totally sure. The kid next door just rubs me wrong. He seems to force himself on others and is always too curious. To be honest I get this bad feeling about him every time I have a conversation with him. There is just something about him. Know what I mean? Well the kid across the street has a record and I think he is in a gang too, but he talks to us all the time. Then the family that just moved in directly across from us has a son that has a parole officer too. The parole officer has all ready come by at least three times that I know of. That kid seems friendly enough too. I went out and met him the first day they moved things in. I hate to say it but I really hope the police were here for the kid next door. I know, I know, I shouldn't be like this. Still I cannot help it. This kid makes me not want to leave our house with nobody home, not even for a second. To this day, I still do not know what happened the other day. I need to ask my neighbors but I've been too busy with Kevin, doctors, and everything else to ask. My Facebook friends tell me I should call the police department to find out. I just don't have time for all of that or when I do it's too late like now. Eventually I will figure it out, but for now I am going to go with that feeling in my gut and keep my guard up around this kid. There is a reason I am feeling this way.
The last time I got this feeling was when I met one of Danielle's English teachers when she was in High School. That teacher was too chummy with his female students and I warned Danielle to never get in a situation where you are alone with this guy. He was the girls swim coach too. Later he had all of his students write a paper based on the movie Indecent Proposal. He wanted the students to write about what they would do if they were given the same offer. I was outraged and called the school to complain as soon as Danielle told me about it!! Anyway,
This teacher eventually was fired for some incident that happened. Danielle said he was on Facebook talking about how wonderful he was. Danielle said she commented on his post and said he wasn't a good teacher and that he never taught his classes anything. I thought that was incredibly brave of her to say. She gets a little upset when an English teacher does not do their job. I guess that's because she is going to school to become a High School English teacher. That is if the school she works at does not convince her to change her major.
You see, Danielle is working with several special needs students right now. In fact, the parents of these students have requested that Danielle work with these kids this year too. So she moved up a grade with these kids. The principal and the school psycologist have been trying to convince Danielle to change her major. They say she is wonderful with these kids, but she is not easy on them. She knows how to get them to do their work and she knows when these kids have been pushed too far. Danielle would probably switch majors but she knows her own limits. Another words, Danielle doesn't think she could do it all the time. I think she knows herself and her limitations and she has got to do what she feels is right for her. Time will tell.
It's late and I still need to get to bed. Kevin needed help getting a drink and then later turning on something in the room. Now that it's 2:30 a.m. I think I'm finally ready to get to bed. Hope you all have a wonderful night. Take care and we will talk with you soon.