Tuesday, March 4, 2014

It completely took the wind out of sails.

Did you ever have one of those days when you receive news and it literally stops you in your tracks and you are in a state of shock from that point on?  Today is one of those days.  I wish I could explain, but I can't at this time.  More on this in a few days down the road....Life takes you in some very crazy places and directions sometimes.  The quote, "Life happens" comes to mind.  All of sudden I have a desire to run screaming from reality, from life, from everything.  BUT, that will not help or solve anything, and I know that.  This is one of those moments I wish I could visit or get a visit from my Heavenly Father for one of those hugs you sometimes need from a parent.  You are never too old for a hug from your mother or father.  Since I cannot receive a hug from my Heavenly Father at this time, I have to find other ways to deal with this as I hold back a flood of tears and try to be strong for everyone else around me.  My heart is aching and I am completely crushed.  How I wish I could share this with you.  Then maybe you would understand why I am trying to hold it together.  I need to move on to another topic before everyone around me sees the tears streaming.  I happen to be sitting in a dimly lit living room at the moment, so they cannot see my face well.  It's time to make decisions and form a plan, and plan some more.  Hopefully with the Lord's help this will merely be but a moment, or a small bump in road.  And with a little luck hopefully this will be a blessing in disguise and nothing more.  

Topic change....NOW!
Danielle made me the cutest necklaces yesterday.  I love them.  I bought the stuff and had Danielle help me put them together.  I actually did not buy the right stuff so when I tried to wear it today at work, it came apart.  So, I need to go get the right stuff.  Then it won't come apart like it did again.  I cannot wait to get the things I need to get it fixed.  I will have to post a picture when I get it fixed.  

Lexi has another tournament this weekend.  They are in division 1.  Her team is in the top 8 teams for her age group. This is awesome news.  Go Lexi.  Go Mesa Volleyball Club 15.  

Right now my children are actually picking up their shoes, backpacks, games, socks, and whatever else in my living room and family room without an argument.  WOW!!!!  I am loving this.  I think they know today is not a day to give Mom or Dad a hard time.  We have awesome children.  In fact, it reminds me of when Kyle was in kindergarten.  He started out going to kindergarten in Phoenix when we moved back to Arizona from El Paso, Texas.  He had all day kindergarten too.  His teacher had a pretty rough class.  When I went in for parent-teacher conferences she said all the other kids in her class gave her trouble but Kyle never did.  She said she would find herself telling the class to look at how Kyle was acting and try to be more like him.  I was completely taken back by what she was telling me because this was NOT the Kyle I knew.  In fact, I think I told her I thought Kyle was just tired every day because he never goes to bed when he is told and he never falls asleep until at least 10pm. Honestly, the Kyle I knew was in to everything and got into a few arguments with his older sister all the time at home.  I was always playing referee with them.  My reply to his kindergarten teacher must have been something like this, "Are you sure you are talking about my son?"  I was completely surprised when she told me that, because of Kyle's excellent behavior and because he is such a good student he is going to be student of the month at the school.  Again, I was in total disbelief.  Not my son.  Are you kidding me????!!!!  But that is exactly what happened.  Kyle was student of the month for his entire school in KINDERGARTEN!!!  How tough could those other students be?  Seriously!?!  The teacher couldn't handle 5 year old children!!!  And then I went on a field trip with the class and I began to understand why this teacher had trouble.  Those kids were out of control!  Little did I know at the time that teachers really can't discuss their students with other parents.  She never really explained the trouble she was having other than by rolling her eyes each time we got on the subject in that parent-teacher conference.  If she would have explained her situation to me even in general terms I never would have agreed to go on the field trip, much less let my son be in that class.  Imagine this teacher's frustration and disappointment when we had to tell her that we were moving to Mesa in the middle of the school year.  She cried on Kyle's last day of school.  She even had the class write Kyle and sent every single note to us at our new home.  Kyle, of course, loved the attention and the notes and pictures from his old class.  It was very sweet and very nice.  All because Kyle was an example and he didn't even know it at the time.  He was just being himself.  Kyle has often been an example simply by being himself.  In fact, later in High School he was recognized by his football coach for being an example.  I think I wrote about this in a previous post.  We attended the Football Banquet at the end of the season.  The Coach was passing out awards.  The Coach said this need young man is the kind of young man I want playing for me.  He comes to every practice, works hard, encourages his teammates, never swears, never gets angry, and never talks back.  In fact, this young man is not the best player on this team, but give me an entire team of young men just like him and I will be a very happy coach.  Then is said Kyle Schmidt please come forward.  We were in complete shock again!!!  Now after his mission, he continues to be a great example. Sure he is still the same little kindergartner we remember at the age of 5 giving his big sister, little brother and little sister a hard time every chance he gets.  BUT all in all, he is a good example and tried very hard to do what he knows to be right.  Sure, he gets discouraged just like the rest of us, but those times are but a moment and he will snap back into the fine young man we all know him to be.  He is not one that leads with words.  He leads by the example that he sets.

Danielle is another awesome child.  She will blow you away with her ability to help in every way possible.  This girl has been my rock, literally, over the past 4 years.  She has helped me in more ways than you will ever know.  To this day, I still do not know how we made it through those two years while Kyle was on his mission without her help.  Seriously!  She gets lots of comments asking her why she doesn't move out.  She is 25 and still living at home.  She heard many comments from good members of the church giving her a hard time for living at home.  I for one, could not believe that another member of the church didn't get it.  Let me tell you, this girl can save money, pay bills, work two jobs, maintain an ETSY shop, and go to school full-time like a PRO!!!  She is doing exactly what she should be doing right now.  Working on improving herself.  Getting an education.  Do I sound a little defensive about this?  Absolutely, I do!!!  Partly because I know what she has been through to get where she is.  I know the sacrifices, I know the trials she has faced, we have faced as a family and yet she still has accomplished some of her goals.  Sure, it may be taking her a little longer than it takes most people, but she is determined and I have no doubt she will finish with her degree in hand and a lot of experience to go with it.  GO Danielle.  

We love all of our kids.  Lexi and Curtis as well.  They are awesome too.  (I don't want them to feel left out)  Tonight, more than ever, we understand why certain things have worked out the way they have.  We couldn't do anything without each of them and we would never want to try.  They are our everything and our greatest blessing and because of that, we are the richest people on the earth.

"Life is made up not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindness and small obligations given habitually are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."  ---David O. McKay

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